Thursday, April 30, 2009
I never thought people i loved would be the biggest disappointment in my life...
Let's just say i'm not the happiest kid on earth right now.
I feel really really moody & tired & stressed & everything.
Why is it people i put in effort for always end up being the ones who hurt & disappoint me the most? Why the f did i even care? I just want everything to turn out right.
Ever since mum left for melbourne, everything's been spiralling into a really big huge tornado-size mess.
Everything seems to be disappointing me & it's making me feel like such a freak.
I go to school everyday this week feeling like such a fakey, since i am really dealing with many things at home. The laughing & laughing in school numbs everything going through my head though but it would be so much easier if i had a better hold over my emotions.
Yesterday i called mum & complained & cried while talking on the phone. I miss her so much & wish she was here to help me.
I haven't got any housework done since it's really all useless with people not respecting my house & giving me problems.
I hate going home everyday & try to stay out as late as possible. But there's really nothing to do outside. I only look forward to school, where all the fun seems to drown out the frustration that's driving me insane.
No support, no pillar of strength to rely on. Boyf isn't really a v supporting person & just adds on to everything wrong. I try so hard to do everything right but sometimes it seems i'm just wasting my time & effort. Everything is, as it seems to be, really useless.
My brother... forget it. What is an older sibling for, really? Don't expect respect from me when you don't give a damn about everything.
God... He's busy i guess.
But i don't hate anybody or my life, just v afraid of many things & irritated............
Another point - red alert yesterday & then major cramps. Couldn't go for stagearts dance audition today & yeah. If i don't get into foreign bodies, i'm gonna be cca-less.
2nd sad point here - My mum told me there's nothing much to buy in melbourne since singapore sells stuff cheaper so she didn't get anything for me. MAJOR DISAPPOINTMENT.
I wish wish wish i could change everything!!!!! URghhhh. It's pissing me off so badly i wanna murder people now.
Hope i stop being so moodless/moody.
at 8:16 PM
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Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Talk things over, we'll find a solution...
I MISS MY MOTHERRRRRR. :(
Haha okay anyway i'm blogging coz i feel happy today! :D
I think i laughed hard enough to get my "abs" again. teeheeee.
My econs lecturer v cartoon person man. Can't stop laughing at her. CHINCY. HAHAHA.
K k anyway so had lecture & tutorials today. Quite bearable, felt sleepy only during chincy's lesson, which was close to the end of the day, thank god man. Of course i stayed awake! heh.
Then after class went down to baby's school. Jalan jalan shout here shout there eat at ps then went back home. Heh.
Not bad ah school & life so far's been absolutely fabulous man. PLS PLS PLS PLS PLS remain this way tyvm.
Heh :) so tomorrow gonna go down to Nic's school AGAIN for lunch since lecture ends at 10am WOOHOO! Then revision & housework for the rest of the day. :/
V v confused with CCA. What if i don't get to either of the dances i'm gonna audition for? WTH am i gonna join man. oh man if only i had dance classes now!!!!
Anyway. Haiya.
Tata peeps. Wish i have pictures but NO the mother took the camera off to auzzie with her.
at 10:47 PM
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Thursday, April 23, 2009
Don't mean to break it to you, but you ain't rockin buddy...
THIS IS A POST FOR ME TO RANT!!! Can't take it no more!
I am so frustrated by people with attitude problems & most disgustingly, MOOD SWINGS!!!!!!!
Arghh i wanna kill of them! SLAUGHTER SLAUGHTER SLAUGHTER.
Like wth?! I've been dealing with bitches for 4 years in secondary school & i really don't need that in poly anymore? hello, i've only known you for 4 freaking days! who the hell do you think you are to show me your bloody attitude?
I haven't even shown you mine la.
Bitch bitch bitch. I hate stupid single minded bitches with severe mood swings.
Like please go look in the mirror & say hello i hate you & you suck pretty badly.
SWING SWING SWING. what a wild ride uhhhh.
I do not tolerate people like you? so don't expect me to compromise to all your rubbish & stupid black faces.
URGGGHHHHHH terrible feeling. 4 years of suffering & endurement in secondary school, then looking forward to poly for a new start, only to find out there are WORSE people???!!!!
WTF PLEASEEEEEEEE!!!! I only knew you for 4 days! how dare you show me that freak face of yours.
Hmph. K cool down jos. Don't think of bringing a parang tomorrow. do. not. bring. sharp. objects. to. school.
SIGGHH.
In secondary school i had to face bitches in my class EVERYDAY yet i felt it wasn't much of a problem since i could easily ignore them. But wtpiang? 4 days? you should really try making friends with a dog for 4 days & see if it'll still try to bite you.
OK.
Done with the ranting. done done done.
Now to school.
SIGHHHH School today is alright except for some urgh stuff/person.
OMG i am so lost with statistics! HAVE TO CATCH UP!! Lecture was sooo boring. :O
& there's poa tutorial tomorrow bleh bleh bleh.
but good thing at least cca fiesta did a GREAT deal of distracting me. the performances were epic & Amazing!!
stagearts drama & dance were soooo awesome.
I signed up for many many CCAs & am so lost as to which one to choose, like dragon boating, foreign bodies, stagearts dance + drama + makeup, kickboxing (LOL) & many others.
got so many trials to go to!
& most of the boys in my class joined foreign bodies! haha i'd love to see them dance. HEHE!
Haven't danced in a long while i think i'm like crap already.
:( oh no worried for so many things. Need to relax & take a break.
Met mummy after school & had a great japanese dinner yummmy.
Walked around & attempted to shop but my bag & lappy was freaking heavy so i kinda was like dead? Sat in a cafe & talked to mummy.
She's going to melbourne on sunday! I got next week all to myself. ALONEEEY ON MY OWNEEY.
BYE i'm gonna read up on POA now. :/
at 10:58 PM
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Wednesday, April 22, 2009
You made me hold back, silly...
ALOHA! :) WOOHOOOO sorry for the absence coz school's started & i have a million things to do everyday! HEehee i'm a poly student now.
School's AWESOME man! I got the best class anyone could ever be in, though some people are kinda quiet. Heh especially the boys! No eye candy sadly. HAh good in a way, concentrate better in class!
Orientation with half the class only! My motivation to wake up every morning.
& i did v well for my speech yesterday! :D heh.
I found some cool buds to hang around with, & Sylvia's my make-me-laugh machine.
Today i laughed so hard i almost vomitted coz the food came up my throat!! scary.
the lessons are pretty easy to grasp, FOR NOW. & i revise lectures at home again!
Gonna be a v v v hardworking person.
Dilema on what to wear EVERYDAY!!!! Valerie calls me stylo queen? haha all the seniors are so well dressed!
Poly life treats me good. SO GOOD. i hope it won't be temporary though. :/
So anyway we had CCA fair (a.k.a club crawl) today & i'm so confused! Got no idea what i want to join. Most probably drama coz the people there are so exciting. hehe. Or maybe sports. For exercising!
I like going to school. :) haha still not sure whether sec school was better or poly. Maybe coz it's just the beginning!
It's gonna be so tiring & stressful coz the stuff to learn gets harder & harder. Must must buck up!
Hopefully i have more time to blog!
Urgggh Macdonalds everyday no wonder i'm growing fat. & yesterday the big famz ate at a chinese restaurant with chilli crab & cold plate & kong ba pao etc. WOW! ate soo much man.
Man i really hope things stay the way they are like now! I don't wanna make enemies & hate going to school one day!
at 10:58 PM
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Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Sweet angel I'll teach you to be stronger...
I'm a happy kid today! :D
Went out with BoyF & phewwww! Bought so many things nic carried all of them!
Ate the best tempura ever at anchorpoint then to queensway shopping center where all the shopping began!!
He bought his bag & shoes, & ohhhh the sweetie of mine bought me shoes too!!! like finally i got them. :) happy dappy.
Then down to Orchard & shopped! We didn't even bother finding food this time! Coz we realized we usually spend a lot of $ on food, but we were so engrossed in shopping we totally didn't eat! heehee good in a way.
& then.... Nicholas bought his headphones & got me one tooo!!!!!!
LoVe X 10000000000.
It's super chio coz it's pink. HAHA!
Hmm so anyway it was so fun we laughed & talked & laughed & talked.
If only i had a picture to end off this post!
Yeah sadly i didn't manage to get any pictures! :( Busy with the shopping & what a pity coz my outfit was a rawwwwker ensemble!!!! Heh never mind soon soon.
OH OH a stupid bird decided to poop on me today!!!! How unlucky!
Of all times, why must it poop when i was queueing for milkshake! :@ Stupid stupid bird. Boyf cleaned it up for me.
well, that was the only downside of the day. Other than that, it was awesome.
MMM.
What with poly starting soon for both of us & new friends coming along, i wonder if there'll be another day like this. :/
Will hope for one more of today to come. :]
Till then.
at 11:26 PM
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Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Kissed by harmony...
So so tired these few days. Sleeping at unearthly hours really has taken a toll on my health!
I feel like such a potato. :(
Picked up Nic's new spectacles in the morning! YAY! Finally!
After so long, he changed his spectacles! Looks like a smarter person now too. teehee.
Will post pictures of it tomorrow if i bring my camo out!
Back to school shopping!! Hehe but sadly it's only for nicholas :( i doubt i'll be able to get anything tomorrow!
The other day when mummy went shopping with me i bought almost everything needed for school. Except stationery. Yep.
I even bought a new bottle! haha & it's sooo cuteeee. Oh my mum bought for Nic a bottle too :)
I really gotta take care of all my stuff! It's costing a hole in the pocket just to get the basic coz i am v spendthrift heheheh oh well can't wait to use em all!
Hehe hope everything goes smoothly tomorrow when we go out! As in like, no quarrels? MmM.
It's 2 more weeks to DDAY! Scary. Or. What.
Oh 2 more weeks till mummy goes to auzzie.
& next week's orientation!!! bleh bleh bleh i'm so scared i can't make new friends. :/
K must have confidence in myself. That's how i survived in secondary school too so i'll do the same for poly. Only better.
OHH!!! btw did i mention, in the afternoon i was awaken by a phone call. & it turned out to be from Temasek Poly! Telling me that they have a spot for me in the course i applied for. omg ecstasy!!! But i decided to reject it coz i don't want to regret it in the end.
Pray that i don't make the wrong choice! :D
Alright must return laptop to nicholas now bye folkies. Who the hell still reads my blog man.
at 11:22 PM
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Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Some will seek forgiveness...
HI ALL :) i'm using baby's lappy to blog! hehe ooh his lappy is so pretty i'm jealous :/
Anyway mine's RED so haha win his anytime.
:D we got the same iPod now! wheeee so weird uh he can still buy the old version of ipod. yay happy dappy.
k so my brother downloaded a lot of amazing race episodes!!! omgggg i am so addicted to amazing race! i watched one episode on Monday & i'm already so on to it.
heeheehee i wanna go out! anyway actually Nic & i had a big big fight but everything's OKAY now so yay.
I'm so random but i LOVE KINDER SURPRISE!!!!!
heh k gonna go continue watch amazing race now tata.
P.S: IT'S APRIL FOOLS' DAY!!!! i tricked people! & got tricked first by my brother. :(
at 6:46 PM
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